Second Hand

Second Hand

Shinny and elegant,
Ticking away, The moments of my life
Relentlessly.

Deadly Departed

Deadly Departed

I sit in the yard enjoying a drink,
And into a book my teeth start to sink.
The scene was absolutely serene,
The sweat on my glass even seemed to gleam.

When out of no were this scene was disturbed,
By a being the size, less a tenth of a bird.
without care I shooed it away,
Intent on returning to enjoying my day.

But this would not be,
Oh no it would not.
This little intruder stole the peace that I sought.

No...That wig-ed devil buzzed so close to my eyes,
That I saw the soul of a creature despised.
I waved a hand in front of my face
Trying to expel this beast from my space.

But bobbing and weaving this monster eludes,
Evading my every attempt to remove,
This beast from my space, A rage ensued.

Totally engulfed in the fit that I pitched.
Consumed by a desire,
To kill that bothersome son of a bitch.

Now normally I'm not a violent man,
But there is only so much I can stand,
How much is a man expected to stand
Especially from a member of a shit eating clan.

Taking a break on the table he lands,
I slammed down the book
That was still in my hand,
That book in my hand
On the table I slammed.

...Splat!

At last I had done it That beast I had slain.
My joy at that feat was Impossible to contain.
I lifted the book and saw what I feared,
Nothing was there, Not even a smear.

Defeated I sat, opened the book I earlier started,
And smiled as my finger slipped on the guts,
Of the deadly departed.

A poem for Stephen Colbert

Who Made Who

In the bible,
Mary is pure as can be
I always wondered,
How this could be?

At last this biblical
Riddle is solved,
Of how Jesus was born
And died for us all

Mary would need,
Some seed to concieve
The baby that all
Humanity needs

She looked around
And what seed did she find?
Colbert's 401
Yeh, it travels through time

So here is a question
For that young Irish lad
Who exactly,
was Jesus' dad?

Conan admit it,
There's no reason to stall
You know just like I do
Colbert created us all.

A Poem For Ashley, My Wife

The Light in My Life

I wake in the morning,
Sit on the edge of our bed.
Trying to clear,
The fog from my head.

I slip out of bed,
And quietly dress
I give you a kiss,
And know that I'm blessed.

I'm off to a job,
That I can no longer stand.
I'll be counting the seconds,
Till I see you again.

Because I know,
Whatever happens today
A flash of your smile,
Will make it all float away

I know that you love me,
because when compared to the guys
my lunch is homemade,
Their getting a burger and Fries

They sit around
And disparage their wives
When I speak of you,
I feel only love, contentment and pride

But I guess,
They can't be blamed
If I didn't have you,
I'd also complain

You laugh at my jokes,
Though lame they may be
Your laugh is important,
I almost need it to breath

You're a wonderful mother,
Lover and wife
I'll love you forever,
You're the light in my life.